Drinking Before A Show

Drinking Before A Show, as requested by Corey Brown

1. Drinking before a show is fine if it is done in moderation. Similarly, bits about poop are fine if they are done in moderation as well.
2. Beer before liquor, you edit quicker.
3. Drunkprov is occasionally funny. Your show isn’t that occasion. 
4. The most dangerous type of drinking before a show is when you shoot a Red Bull as you walk on stage. Hyper isn’t funny unless someone is bleeding.
5. Everyone gets loose before a show. Phife Dawg gets loose off of orange juice. It is okay to add gin to that if you plan on rapping.
6. The difference between a crappy montage and a sophisticated harold is your choice between PBR and Oban.
7. If you have a pre-show 40, make sure you have a post-show vomit.
8. Everyone should celebrate fun shows. Celebrate before the show to ensure the show is fun.
9. If your coach tells you that you aren’t allowed to drink before a show, that means he is hogging all the booze for himself. Watch him take notes at the bar.
10. If you don’t finish your drink before the show, leave it near the stage so you can use it as an object later on. This is a good scene.

• Posted in: Words of Wisdom